My world...

Sometimes the world works in such odd ways. Just when you think it cannot get any worse it does and then just when you think it might all be over you catch a break. Today I found out I got a new job. Its my dream role but what has made it sweeter is my families reaction. They are so happy for me and so proud. These past few years have been so tough and although its been hard for me sometimes I think it is harder to witness. When I see my sister is poorly I melt I just want to make her safe and no one has been able to do that for me. My world crumbled around me and my health went from bad to worse. But through it all my family were there to pick up the pieces and pick me up literally. I know this sounds like a pity party but I do not feel sorry for myself. Although I hate my body sometimes and what it does I don't feel sorry for myself. How can I? I am surrounded by this amazing family full of people who love me and would do anything for me. If I was to call them at 1am they would come no questions. They are always there. They provide me with my backbone, they are my support system. As I continue on my journey to get better, to grow in confidence and regain myself they are there with me. I've hit a rough patch of late and I am faltering. Its a tough time being out of work and with no proper home I've started to fit daily this week. So when I rang them to tell them I've been offered my first proper full time job since my accident they were overjoyed and tears flowed. I am so full of love for them right now and am so grateful. I love my family and am not ashamed. I know I'm lucky. Lucky to be alive, lucky to have my parents, lucky to have my siblings but most of all I am lucky that they didn't give up on me as I wanted to. I think I get to be the favourite today! 

Real life...

I have started fainting again. 

I am scared.

I don't want to admit it

I don't want to admit defeat. 

I am suffering

I need help.

But I will get help

and I will beat this.

I have to.

L.O.V.E...

This is quite simply the most beautiful website I have ever seen. With all this talk of love who cares if you are unemployed. 

I've got to admit...

Denise looks lovely in her wedding dress. I love her hair band! I think they have the perfect beach look, casual elegance. I don't even mind her marrying Lee anymore as this picture is so lush. 

Not blogged in a while...

Mainly due to having a very painful kidney infection ow ow ow but also due to not having much to say. I must be ill that never happens.

Two things

1, I went to the Saatchi and loved these people

2, I saw Let The Right One In because my friend was ashamed of me for seeing Twilight and loving it. Now I liked this film a lot it was beautifully shot and a very clever idea. But it doesn't take away from the fact that I LOVE Twilight i simply adore it. Its love story is so huge and out of this world it draws me in and I'm a sucker. Also there isn't actually that much blood in Twilight not like this film which was bloody to say the least.

Love love love...

So it has come to my attention (my boyfriend told me) that I use the word love way too much. I'm always in love with people, TV, places or clothing. Its always love and I always mean it. But am I simply short of adjectives or do I actually love everything?


Love a (1): strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (2): attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (3): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests b: an assurance of love 2: warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion

These are alternatives I could use -

admire, adulate, be attached to, be captivated by, be crazy about, be enamored of, be enchanted by, be fascinated with, be fond of, be in love with, canonize, care for, cherish, choose, deify, delight in, dote on, esteem, exalt, fall for, fancy, glorify, go for*, gone on, have affection for, have it bad, hold dear, hold high, idolize, long for, lose one's heart to, prefer, prize, put on pedestal, think the world of, thrive with, treasure, venerate, wild for, worship

I think I'm just enthusiastic. I see something and get way too excited and fall for it quickly. If I can't stop thinking about it I obsess and then yes say I love it. I don't love everything. I don't love Zac Efron, Glamour magazine or Lily Allen. I do love Russel Brand, Sex and the City and Britney. But these have been in my heart for ages they aren't just flash in the pans they run deep into my psyche. Yes I might be sad and just a girl but this is me. I will try and widen my vocabulary and mix it up but when I get excited and want people to know it I will be using the L word and yeah I will actually mean it.

Me me me...

This has been doing the rounds and I'm feeling self indulgent

What’s the last thing you read or are currently reading?
I'm reading Twilight at the moment. Cliche I know but I have read it before and I forgot how much I do actually love it before the series goes all crazy and werewolves aplenty.

Do you nap a lot?
Not really I try to sometimes but it never really works.

Who was the last person you hugged?
my lovely sister Jade

What’s your current obsession/addiction?
coffee, coffee and more coffee

What are you wearing right now?
my blue H&M nurses dress

What was for dinner?
breakfast...was porridge oats and bananas and of course coffee

What have you been listening to lately?
Oasis and Britney

If you could have any super power, what would it be?
Fly got to be Peter Petrelli

What is your favorite weather, and why?
Sunny sunny summer days

What was the last thing you bought?
Salad yesterday for my tea

Say something about the person who tagged you:
they are beautiful

If you could have a house- totally paid for, fully furnished- anywhere in the world, where would you want it to be?
New York City

Favorite vacation spot?
New York

Favorite pair of shoes you keep going back to over and over, even though your closet is overflowing with a zillion others?
Black flats with a gold buckle I can't get enough of them

Name one thing you cannot live without.
coffee

If you could wake up anywhere tomorrow, where would it be?
Paris

Flowers in the park...

Went for a lovely bike ride through Victoria Park as I had to get out the house to relieve my crazyness.





This squirrel came right up to me on my bike wasn't scared at all.

Maybe the most perfect film trailer ever...

need to see this...

Ten things they should tell you before you do a design degree...

1. Living away from home is terrifying at first but turns into the best experience of your life
2. This is the time you can be your most creative. Make the most of it.
   
3. If you actually want to get a job at the end of it don't do a making degree as these do not help.
   
4. It doesn't matter how talented you are as a maker no one is going to hand you a job at your degree show.
   
5. There are thousands of students just like you. Creative, talented, unique and all in need of a job.
   
6. They don't teach you all you need to know.
   
7. You really begin to learn when you start living in the real world.
   
8. University is not reality its a holiday park.
   
9. Make, make and then make some more. You'll only regret not using your time wisely.
   
   and finally
   
   
10. You will make the greatest friends in the whole wide world and it will all be worth it.
    

OMG...

Is it wrong to find Zac Efron attractive..?

Pretty...

Got lots to blog about but am awaiting pictures so in the meantime an image from the Science Museum to keep you entertained...

La la la...

Visitors hang from a carnival ride near Beijing's Olympic stadium, now home to the Bird's Nest Carnival that runs until October. I SO WANT TO GO ON THAT!

So I haven't blogged in ages even though I have a lot of free time. I don't think I have been doing anything that interesting. Hopefully that will change today as I'm going to the Science museum to see the wallace and gromit exhibition! so grown up of me!

I watched the Queen last night again. I really like it. I've seen quite a few films that Micheal Sheen has been in and I think he's really great. I love the idea of seeing behind the scenes of the palace. So many people knock her but I love her. She stands for what I love about our country and I can't imagine not having a royal family who would wear all the hats...

I never do this...

This is so not me I'm not the girl who has been planning her wedding since she was 10. I have no idea if I'll ever even get married but if I ever do I want this dress more than anything else. I heart Vivienne Westwood so much and would love one of her trademark dresses but they are so special how would you ever have the right moment to wear one. Then came SATC and I swooned. The dress is perfect yes its dramatic and over the top but its your wedding day and the one day I think you could get away with the dream dress. I thought it was way out of my budget but just seen it on Net A Porter for £4,500! OMG!! just a shame I'm no way near getting married anytime soon....